Christianity vs. Santa Claus
|Each year, a few people tell me that they don’t like the commercialism of the holidays. They are entitled to that, but a few will take it even further and say that they don’t like Santa Claus, that he is un-Christian, and that including that ‘holiday’ stuff in our celebration is evil.
When I was studying to be an educator, I learned that young children have a peculiar psychology that prevents them from knowing fantasy from fiction – there is absolutely no way to keep a child from through this stage. If your kids are going to play “make believe” games, then it is wise for you to play with them and guide those games. Telling your kids about Santa isn’t lying to them – it’s playing along. It also doesn’t get in the way of the real meaning of the holidays.
One of my fondest memories of Christmas came when I was a young boy eager to open my presents on a Christmas morning. My grandfather (who bought us presents signed from “Santa”) pulled out his Bible and read the Christmas story to us. I don’t remember what I received for Christmas, that year, but I never forgot why were celebrating.
So, please don’t hate Santa. It bugs me each year when people criticize the commercialism of Christmas so much that the children don’t get to enjoy the wonder and magic that the holidays can offer.
Then again, maybe the reason people don’t like Santa is because the first one they saw was this one:
He’s creepy. You’re definitely welcome to keep that guy out of your house.
Adam, to be straight to the point… you said it isn’t lying its playing along… respectfully… no, it isn’t… I play along with my son and daughter in their pretend games like super heroes and such. I do not though tell them that Superman or Cinderella are in fact a real person nor do I pretend to leave things for them that are done by those characters.
I see your logic but think to say that it is the same as any other fantasy is a bit of a stretch.
If you tell your kid or anyone something that isn’t true, it is a lie. If you’re child says, ‘daddy, is Santa real.’ and you say ‘yes’ you are lying…
This will be a bit lengthy but just thought I’d toss them out there… My wife and prayerfully toiled over the issue for some time when we had our first child. Ultimately we decided not to do the Santa thing… here are some of the reasons.
Among other things we discussed, wouldn’t it be better to establish a pattern of honesty with our children by telling them the truth about Santa? Wouldn’t it be better that they grow up with a confidence that, even in the small things, we were honest with them?
I explain to my children that with the game of Santa that some people play their gifts are dependent on their good behavior throughout the year… I explain that it is a ridiculous standard of perfection that cannot be kept. (Romans 7:18)
It sends a message on top of that, when we buy gifts for them anyway,and say that Santa overlooked their bad behavior, that behavior really doesn’t matter apparently…
I reasoned with my four year old and she totally understood. I said, ‘Sweetheart, are you good all year round? Do you do things sometimes that get you in trouble?’ she said ‘yes daddy’ I said, ’so if you have to be good for Santa to give you gifts… do you think that he should bring you any?’ she said ‘no’. Then I went on to explain that mine and her mother’s gifts to her and her brother aren’t based on their goodness. They are given because we love them. She totally got it and said that she understood it and even later hugged me and said ‘thank you daddy for loving me and brother.’
Christmas is such a wonderful time to share about the Birth of the Savior its true. But oh how much more can be demonstrated! I explain to my kids that I love them and their gifts aren’t dependent on their goodness. It affords me to explain to them that their mother and I are bad sometimes… that we sin too. I asked my daughter if she loved me, she said yes… I asked her if I am mean sometimes and shout at her on occasion if I’m angry (rare). She said yes… I asked her if my mistakes every now and then make her not love me… she looked shocked that I would even pose such a question and said no… I still love you.
So explaining that they get gifts from us and from their family because we love them and not because they’ve been good… what door does that open for me to begin explaining? hmmm that sounds so familiar… (Eph. 2; John 3:16, THE WHOLE BIBLE! ha)
I can then explain to them the most amazing gift ever. The gift of eternal life and salvation. That knowing we can’t be good and in fact because we are bad, God sent Jesus to save those who will forsake this world and trust in Him!
My children love Christmas, they know they’ll get gifts from their mother and I. They love helping their mom decorate a tree a watching Christmas movies… all of those things are a part of the holiday tradition. Santa though crosses the line between tradition and distraction. Kids don’t go to bed hoping the tree produces magic present fruits or that frosty walks through their door… they do go to sleep hoping a jolly old man will leave them gifts.
As well intentioned as parents may be, it is still misleading to the child. Maybe my parents failed in not stressing the importance of Christ over Santa. I don’t know… but growing up with the Santa thing in my life and also in a Christian home, I know I knew the reason for the season but I rarely glorified that over the stuff I would get the next morning… and that mentality didn’t change much after learning the truth about Santa either…
So we don’t do it… and yes we get villified for it… told that we are robbing our children of the joy of Christmas… coming from unbeliever’s that comment doesn’t bother me.. coming from brethren… it saddens me. How inoculated to our culture have we become when we would dare make a statement like that. To even propose the idea that there is any mythical story that can enhance Christmas or that the Biblical narrative behind Christmas isn’t sufficient for a joy filled holiday to me is to flirt with idolatry…
we do watch the Santa movies, frosty, etc… but they understand them to be fantasy just as my son understands Superman & Spiderman are fantasy and my daughter understands that Cinderella & Belle are fantasy… I did Santa as a child and when I learned the truth about him, EB, TF, and so on… I felt stupid. I started remembering comments I’d made about them to adult relatives and such and how foolish I must have looked and how they knew the truth. I was a bit upset. I also had a slightly difficult time reconciling the belief in those myths with the reality of Jesus for a time after.
We have a great time with pretend. We do, though, teach our kids to respect that other families choose to let their kids believe in Santa. That it isn’t their job to be the school yard herald and proclaim their knowledge. I tell them that if asked whether they believe in Santa they are not to lie. They are to tell the truth. But if not asked, or if they just hear a friend talking about it. Keep their mouth shut about it. It isn’t their place to do that. While we don’t agree Santa should be done by Christians, we know that is between each family and God.
I agree, Adam. Also, though…why not tell them the story of the real St. Nicholas? It adds a historical Christian reality to the whole thing, so he’s not just this benevolent spirit who flies around magically. I’ve never understood why people poo-poo Christmas anyway. I guess they don’t want people to enjoy it, since they don’t?
J.
You missed something. Read the section of my blog entry in which I discuss child psychology. If your child can’t tell reality from fantasy than you are not lying when you play along. Since they will be playing games without knowing what is real, is it good to be a part of those games so you can influence them and understand them. As the child grows up, they learn to discern the difference between games and real life.
I’m not talking about lying to a kid who can know better.
Amy, I agree with the idea of teaching them about the historical St. Nicholas. Also, I appreciate the correlation of Advent (preparing our hearts for Christ’s coming) and “being good for Santa.” I know it’s not the same thing; not a perfect metaphor, but the feelings of anticipation are so similar, that I sort of think the Santa myth can be instructive in teaching about the “true fairy story” — the gospel, and making sure we are prepared for Christ’s return. I guess that’s where parental involvement comes in with how you “play along” with the Santa game. Can’t Santa, like other things affected by the Fall, be reclaimed for righteous uses?
Adam, the problem with that response is that it implies the children come up with the Santa myth on their own.
I don’t disagree with your blog post, so far as it goes, but most likely my kids will get the same treatment as J’s.
I don’t think the kids will make up Santa on their own – I think they will see him on TV and hear about him from other kids. Keeping them from knowing about the Santa legend is no simple thing, and once their mind catches onto that game it like taking pee out of a swimming pool.
I do like the idea of teaching them about the true St. Nicholas… that is a great idea actually…
Maybe we can just exchange gives for the sole purpose of love. Why does Christmas have to have any meaning other than that?
@ Anonymous: You can marry someone just for their looks, too, but that just leaves your marriage a pitiful and tragic shell and what marriage ought to be. It’s the same with a Christmas without Christ as its meaning.
@J, @James, @Adam, I am a therapist who works with severely mentally ill children. I see children who are schizophrenic, hear voices, experience hallucinations and the like. I also know mentally healthy children who don’t, and when it comes to Christmas they all “know without knowing” where the truth lies about Santa being real. I think it’s appalling that we would strip our children of the ability to daydream about what could be (because isn’t that really what hopes and dreams are, is daydreams we try to strive for?) for teaching them that life is cold and hard and filled with strife? J, I feel saddened for your children, in that it sounds as though you’re trying to make them little adults without the opportunity to engage in the normal mental processes children need to go through. As Adam said, if your child isn’t allowed to imagine and mentally create, they will not develop the kinds of filters that allows them to evaluate something for it’s truth or its error. If they wholeheartedly believe what person X tells them or person Y tells them, just because that person hasn’t “lied” (as you put it) to them in the past, then that leaves them wide open to a whole other set of problems because they don’t learn the fine art of critical thinking and common sense… So with that, I’m begging you, please allow your children to experience some fantasy and magic this season… There’s nothing sadder than a child who’s been stripped of their ability to mentally create a better / happier / more magical world…
I guess I partially don’t understand because I’ve never considered belief in Santa Claus a marker for childhood creativity and/or a sense of magic & wonder.
@Kari
“I think it’s appalling that we would strip our children of the ability to daydream about what could be (because isn’t that really what hopes and dreams are, is daydreams we try to strive for?) for teaching them that life is cold and hard and filled with strife?”
HAHA I absolutely love how the extreme pro-Santa ilk such as you seem to be of love to construct this straw man argument against those who choose not to participate in the Santa deception. You assume that just because I don’t lie to my children about Santa that I, in retrospect, stifle their dreams and hopes and crush their creativity… oh look at the ogre who doesn’t let his kids believe in the Santa part of Christmas.
Let’s get something crystal clear here. I do NOT forbid my children from anything. I do not prevent them from believing anything they want. They are individuals with their own mind and can choose to believe whatever they desire. I will not endorse a the Santa character not because I don’t want them to use their imaginations but because the person of Santa TAKES AWAY FROM THE TRUE FOCUS OF CHRISTmas and that is the Birth of the Savior, Jesus Christ!
I do not “strip” anything away from my children. I add to it by keeping their vision clear of distractions of this observance. They don’t hate me for telling them the truth about Santa nor do they miss out on ounce of joy from the season… trust me there…
Furthermore, no, day dreams are NOT the true source of hope. The true source of hope is found in Jesus and in Him alone.
“J, I feel saddened for your children, in that it sounds as though you’re trying to make them little adults without the opportunity to engage in the normal mental processes children need to go through.”
Well thank you for that assumption based on your intimate knowledge of my children… I’m glad you can glean ALL of that based on what I teach my children about the secular portion of the holiday season that comes once a year.
I am not trying to make my children “little adults”. Just last night I believe you would have found me crouched under my son’s bed while him and my daughter were pretending I was a lion and they were hunting me… I roared and leaped and we had a great time… after that I hoisted them above me and flew them to their beds while they held their arms out pretending to have the ability to fly… did I sit them on the bed and explain ‘now you know I’m not a lion and you know you can’t really fly’ NO because that would be stupid. That would make me guilty of your claims of my tyranny.
They know that was a game and have a wonderfully healthy fantasy life. There is a HUGE difference between encouraging their fantasy life and creativity versus allowing idolatrous things that take away from the view of the SAVIOR!
“As Adam said, if your child isn’t allowed to imagine and mentally create, they will not develop the kinds of filters that allows them to evaluate something for it’s truth or its error.”
I agree with you, and that’s why I do not hinder their creativity in any shape form or fashion. Because I don’t hinder their imagination my daughter is only beginning pre-k and already able to read and do some basic math… I don’t force studies down her throat… she is just a quick learner and I attribute that to the fact that she has “excercised” her brain, if you will, in play and fantasy and problem solving from early child hood.
My son is equally talented, not in school and can recognize most of his alphabet… he’s two. I attribute that to the same thing.
“If they wholeheartedly believe what person X tells them or person Y tells them, just because that person hasn’t “lied” (as you put it) to them in the past, then that leaves them wide open to a whole other set of problems because they don’t learn the fine art of critical thinking and common sense…”
I agree with you there as well… that has nothing to do with this… as their parent I must Shepherd my child towards God. I have to teach them to Glorify God in all things… so that they grow to see how amazing and wonderful He is and so that they cling to Him for Salvation as they grow old enough to understand their need for it.
“So with that, I’m begging you, please allow your children to experience some fantasy and magic this season…”
Let’s see… encourage fantasy? or build their lives on a truth that can save them? which has more awe filled wonder, a fat man in a red suit or an infant who would make possible the saving of all mankind, heal the sick, restore sight to the blind, raise the dead? hmm seems like a no brainer to me…
I respect a person’s right to do santa with their kids. I don’t agree, but its their right… I am however shocked at how anyone could think that my kids are deprived of any joy of Christmas simply because Santa didn’t bring gifts… that’s absurd and illogical… anyone who would think so is obviously too steeped in culture and has bought the lie that folks like you sell that anyone who doesn’t do the santa thing is just a big meanie who has no heart and is raising their children to be cold, heartless, dull, maladjusted adults… that’s insane…
“There’s nothing sadder than a child who’s been stripped of their ability to mentally create a better / happier / more magical world…”
Give me some proof for that statement. That is an unfounded emotional response to what you read of my last comment that you didn’t like…
In the meantime let me give you some scenarios and see how they play out in your Santa worldview…
Let’s just say that a family is poor, which in this economy isn’t hard to imagine, and let’s say their folks can’t buy Christmas presents of any kind and in fact they’ll be lucky to even have food or electricity on Christmas… this story isn’t much of a stretch because I know a family just like that…
you be that parent and explain why Santa didn’t come visit that home… look that child in the fact and explain why this benevolent fat and jolly old elf neglected to come to their house…
I find it incredibly odd, but not truly surprising, that all those who feel I’m the Christmas joy thief can never produce one single solitary shred of Scripture to back up their view. However, I could point out TONS to support shepherding a child’s heart towards the Savior and making Christ and His Glory the focus of their life….
Fellas, it’s just Santa Claus. Friendly debate is OK, but fighting over Santa is retarded. I am appreciated all of the different viewpoints but I protest the condescending attitude some of you are using. Love does not do such things.
true enough Adam… I, on my part, apologize for that… I felt very attacked through Kari’s comment and responded in an unChristlike manner. Kari, I stand by my position, but apologize for the harshness in doing so.
@J, I never meant to attack you, or for you to feel attacked. I was not in an emotionally aroused state when I responded and did not mean it to be malicious. I went to a self-supporting bible-thumping high school, where nothing but religion was shoved down everyone’s throats, and I think I responded to you from that side of the equation. I am a christian now, but it has taken me a long time to realize that the God that was shoved down my throat at every chance, is not the God that truly lives and breathes amongst us.
I was not advocating a “only” Santa clause, I was, however thinking of the glow in a child’s eyes as they gaze on a winter wonderland or how they laugh when they watch Rudolph the red nosed reindeer.
I believe that the both can be understood by children, because they also understand about the Easter bunny and the like. I think I was advocating less for Santa, and more for balance in views. The only unbalanced thing that Christ ever did was love us. However much we DON’T deserve it.
That said, I realize that if the same words had been used on me, I would have probably also taken offense, and as such I am sorry to have caused you pain / discomfort. Please forgive me.
@Kari consider it forgiven if you will do the same for me… Knowing your background now I can see why you responded that way. It sounds like you were a victim of a legalistic system… I’m glad it didn’t cause you to harden your heart towards our Lord and Savior.
I probably wouldn’t have read it as an attack but it was late in my day and I was getting tired and stressed.
I Praise God for your Salvation too btw that’s awesome!
@J all is forgiven… Yes, I have noticed just in the last half hour how much I’m craving sleep. Maybe my response was an indicator that I need to do some self-care and watch out!!! Thank you for understanding. Blessings to you and yours.