Things You Should Know About Guy Fawkes Day (Before Wearing that Mask)

It’s Guy Fawkes Day in England, which means that Fawkes will be burned in effigy throughout his homeland to celebrate the fact that his plot to blow up parliament in 1605 was a failure.  (This is done even though he wasn’t ever set on fire.) 

Youths all over the world wear Guy Fawkes masks when they promote anarchy under the impression that they would make him proud with their attempts to undermine their government, but they’re wrong.  I don’t think he would understand these anarchists, at all.

Guy Fawkes was not trying to blow up Parliament in order to create anarchy.  His goals were actually much more religious than that: he was hoping to set up a Catholic state.

Far from the anarchist he is portrayed as, Fawkes was protesting Protestant leadership and wanted to see his nation impose a Catholic rule on all of England.  Ever heard of an anarchist who wanted religious leadership from the government?  Well, that’s what Fawkes was all about.

 “A mask of my face would be…fabulous.”

The other thing to remember is that he was not a military prodigy.  Fawkes did not mastermind the Gunpowder plot, he was just the guy who was supposed to guard the explosives, and when he was caught checking on the gunpowder barrels the conspiracy was found out.  Fawkes was tortured until he talked about his comrades, then he managed to kill himself before being sent to a violent death by the authorities.  (Not only is it strange that Guy Fawkes is burned in effigy when he was never set on fire in his life, but the event is also commemorated with large fireworks displays that represent an explosion that didn’t happen.)

So, wearing a Guy Fawkes mask while you protest Wall Street or upload computer viruses doesn’t add up, and it makes about as much sense a dressing like a medieval Crusader while opening a checking account.

“Follow me to the land of free checking!”
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